Time to Get Back to Me!

On the way home I was thinking my most common train of thought lately, I need to lose some weight. For quite a while I was down to 124 which is low enough that I don’t feel the need to change when I pull on a snug t-shirt but I still felt like I’d like to get down to 118. Why? I don’t know; that just is the number that is always in my head to aim for and I would have liked to lose a couple inches.

Then I crept up to 128 and was not thrilled but ignored it, four pounds didn’t make a huge difference in my opinion of me. Now I have been consistent 135 for a couple of weeks and I think I have finally had enough. When I got pregnant with my first son I only weighed 96 pounds, and I went up to 140 something. That was a huge weight gain, and here I am almost to that weight for absolutely no reason.

Changing jobs from unloading trucks and stocking shelves to sitting at a desk made a huge difference. But that change happened 8 or 9 years ago, I think by now my body’s used to it. I have no more excuse except that I’m eating too much and moving too little.

There are lots of things I am not thrilled about in my life that I can’t change so I look on the bright side and deal. But this is not one of those things. This is all me, my daily choices got me here and now I chose to go back to not feeling the need to wear baggy clothes all the time and not feeling bad about myself but ignoring it.

So Monday I’m going to start my first ever real diet, planning all my meals and the whole 9 yards. There are a couple of things that always get me when I try and eat better.

• I don’t want to think about what to have so I just grab a cheese crisp or even a donut on the way to work

• No accountability. I always try this on my own and since no one will even know if I cheat it makes it awfully easy

• I decide to change something and to start NOW. Yes, at midnight or 5 am or whenever the thought crosses my mind

So how am I going to avoid these pit falls? Planning!

1) For a couple of weeks I’m making food painfully easy for myself.

• Every morning I will have a whole grain cereal. If it’s a work day I’m going to have Bob’s Red Mill 10 grain cereal with just a touch of honey. It’s really good, healthy, filling and its 140 calories a serving, plus the honey.

• For lunches I’m going to make a big pot of cabbage soup just because it’s nothing but vegetables and for some reason I’ve been craving it lately.

• For dinner I’m going to have a smoothie. I always have to wait for my dinner to digest before I go running and a smoothie is few calories and not too heavy to run after drinking.

• I’m a big snacker at work so I’ll bring bags of veggies to snack on. I love grape tomatoes and sugar snap peas so that will be my staple.

2) I still have no real life accountability, but I’m going to use this blog and the online communities to post how I’m doing- good AND bad

3) Instead of jumping into this I have been planning to start Monday. Between a birthday party and Easter this weekend I know I’d be off to a bad start, so I’ll try and be smart about things and start on Monday. Plus, I’m giving myself a pass for a weekly night out. I may make up for them by fasting a day until I get down to my ideal weight, but either way I’m taking them.

Wish me luck – I’m at a place where this HAS to happen, I am just tired of me letting myself become this other person who I just do not like. I can even tell a difference in my energy level and mood from before I gained this weight.

I’m 5’2”and small boned. Starting at 135 pounds and a pregnant looking 35 inch waist, but on my way to where I want to be. Anyone else starting a get-fit, back to yourself journey? I’d love to hear from you!